Choosing granite

Nope, I’m not choosing countertops … I decided it was time to do some funeral preplanning. About a year or so ago, I decided I wanted our cremation remains to be interred at the cemetery in Newport News where my Dad is. Keith agreed and one of the purposes of this trip was to make arrangements.

They have separate areas in the cemetery for cremation remains but I kept asking about whether we could have a bench (it holds the ashes of 4 people) in the section of the cemetery my Dad was in. At first they said there was nowhere in that section that a bench could be placed but after some back and forth they came back and said there was a space. They said they will remove the bush in front of Mom, place the bench, and then re-landscape around it.

You can’t tell in this photo but Mom is looking right at Dad’s grave just a couple rows away (it’s hidden behind the bush in the photo). I’m so happy, I never thought I’d be able to get so close!

We visited Dad’s grave while we were there and placed flowers. My sister-in-law is buried nearby and we put flowers on her grave and my sister’s husband’s parents are there too and we put some on their grave also.

After we were done at the cemetery in Newport News, we drove to North Carolina and visited the cemetery where Mom’s parents are on the way to our hotel and left flowers at their grave.


  1. It feels good to have those decisions made, doesn’t it? We have most of our arrangements made already.
    You’ve reminded me to check the flower bed at my parent’s grave site!

  2. We are also doing preplanning. It just seems to be a good thing to do. My MIL has planned her service and it is a comfort to know exactly what her desires are.

  3. Great idea to get everything planned so the family doesn’t have to worry about that. We still have not done that but we have talked about it. It’s so nice you and your mother were able to visit family grave sites.

  4. It’s the right thing to do so your kids don’t have to deal with all that. Terry has lost his father and one sister in the past 3 years. It made us think about what we will do. We consulted with the kids and they are happy with our wishes.
    xx, Carol

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